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Wednesday/ Thursday 16/17th February 12.03.a.m. Home Huntingdon.
JESUS....Halina do you like being in front of the fire? It soothes and warms you doesn't it. But My heart provides endless heat, warmth and love. Your heart must be on fire with love for Me and My Creation. Your heart is not on fire because you resist those impulses of love and do not let Me envelope you with the flame of love.
Today storms battered the 'house' didn't they - a mighty whirlwind tossed you about and like St. Peter you were afraid and so ran away ( with your heart) The pain you suffer is My pain but do not run away, Halina. Endure. Fr. Nicholas is doing My work -I am working through him to teach you humility even though the means appear harsh to you, they are necessary. He does not mean to harm you neither does he fully understand the pain he inflicted - but that is not his purpose. he wishes to jolt you into recognition of who you are before Me. He may think of it in terms of 'estate' but My purpose is deeper. Bow Halina, for the Lord your God is visiting you and shaping you for things to come. Call on My Mothers help all the time and again repeat what I have told you: "You are dust"......
Ponder well the thought on fasting - you have not repeated these yet to Michael do so, so that you can work something out between you before lent. I repeat Halina before lent. Start your fasting and prayer before Ash Wednesday or you will not be able to endure.
Who have you told of the floods? Poor creature - always reticent and perplexed. Please pray for the right person
Halina, Cactus Flower- Keep on sifting those houses for you will soon know My providence. Do not tarry in clearing your fathers house or all that pertains for you cannot do two things at once and there is much to do.
Halina talk more to people of your endeavours.
You see the snow falls to the ground covering it with a mantle of whiteness and pureness but soon Dark night will descend on the earth and all purity will be hidden from view except in the hearts and minds of true believers and followers of My way and My footsteps.
Halina you have waited a good while for your next Rosebuds those again I have planted in your spirit. The next Rosebud is PATIENCE.
Well Halina, not a favourite virtue of yours though you have acquired many of its attributes through suffering. Halina now go to the bookcase of yours and see what I will show you.
(I picked on the first book that caught my eye - "The Everlasting Now" (Fr. George Maloney S.J.). I opened it, but was not sure exactly what I was supposed to see, save the title and the words "Freedom in Love".)
JESUS.... Yes, Halina, I did not wish you to pick up a treatise but just the words : 'Everlasting Now'. Ponder this. To you it seems both obvious and contradictory. How can any thing that is Everlasting, so continuous, be also something in the present... Now? But, Halina, you are unidimensional. I am Not. All that passes is in My Present, in My Now. The closer you get to know Me, the closer you begin to live in the Now of My Omnipotence, Omnipresence. Time becomes an irrelevance, for the Present becomes all that can fill you with Me, not the past or the future, but this second of time. If only you, Mankind, could grasp this, Patience would not be so difficult for you. I have each of My sheep in My hands and heart and see you from birth to death, My Eternal 'Now' for them overflowing with love and concern. You opened the page to Communion of Saints and Angels. they live in My Eternal Now and are Free of time consideration so they give Me continuous Glory and Service. They have acquired Patience in waiting and living for and in the Will of God. Yesterday or tomorrow is of no import to them. My Angels, My Messengers and your Guides and Guardians live only to do My Will at all times. At all times - in all times. They too are timeless. They are not bound by space or moment. They do as they are bid faultlessly. Your Guardian Angel can help you be patient if you ask for 'its' help.
Patience is a virtue and virtue is a grace ....
H.... and Grace is a little girl who never washed her face....
JESUS... Yes, Halina, the second part is funny, but do not let it obscure the meaning of the first statement. Indeed it was added to do that. The Holy Spirit can overshadow by His Presence all aspects of time. Do you remember how, when My Beloved Mother was appearing at Medjugorje, time seem to be in suspension, everything became incredibly still, as on a picture- almost unreal? You experienced this very acutely. You knew it in prayer too. One second can seem like hours and hours like one second. This timelessness should point you to be patient, to always be in the present tense. I am always present to you. Remember that the word patience leads to being Patient. The same word as for 'one suffering or ill' awaiting a cure. Like one enduring. Quite so, a patient, a good patient endures so that they can be healed. In your native Polish "Cierpliwos'c", Patience, literally means waiting in pain - enduring. One full of suffering. Remember how patiently I hung on the Cross. I suffered timelessly and continue My suffering for all of humanity and through My chosen vessels. Halina, please consider the grace and virtue of Patience. It is not only essential to those who carry My Word but to all who wish to teach. It is not simply a matter of sighing deeply and putting up with the inconvenience of waiting, though that can be a start to Holy Patience - but think of Patience in terms of not owning time - not of waiting but of being 'in time' and with time, all time being Mine,.
Stop now and read this to Michael and ponder more on this.
Good night, little pained Cactus. Sleep well tonight and don't forget your penance.
H....Good night, Jesus - I love you. Thank you for Your kindness to me.
Monday 6th March 2000. En Route to Thetford Forest.
JESUS.... Yes, Halina. I did want you to receive this message at home, but as you said "yes' to your husband, I will use this opportunity to speak to you in the car so permitting you time to spend with Me in church as your pastor has dictated (penance). You wished to write down what has been happening to you in your many searchings for a base and home and the various unusual happenings that you carry in your heart. Why go searching when I have told you so explicitly that My Mother would tell you. You asked Her two questions about your membership of the Society and a base ( Society of Our Lady of the Most Holy Trinity or S.O.L.T. ). How did She answer you? Yes, Halina, She said " Go and get some food" .You thought and delayed, but thought She meant temporal food. You realised too late She meant spiritual food. You were supposed to spend time with Me in the church before Me not in the chapel. She was pointing you back to Me, to My Presence. The lady who locked the doors, making it difficult to pray any longer, said ; "He who hesitates is lost". Yes that's right. You still hesitate to much. You wanted to know about your membership of the Society of Our Lady. This is becoming clear to you through Father Flanagan and his 'veto' of your plans. All is not yet revealed but, My dear child, why do you do seeking membership, when you are called to found something for My Mother? Have you not realised yet, that you are a member of Her Society? You are under Her Mantle. Did you not dedicate yourself to Her under the title of Our Lady of Mount Carmel when you were a child? She has always protected you. The new house is Her house for She will lead others to Me through this house. She will guard the doors and permit no one to desiccate the sanctuary. You will have the True Body of Me, your Redeemer and Saviour.
Halina, pray for more faith. A prophet that keeps silent does not deserve the title. Halina I bid you to speak. I send encouragers to you. How strongly your friend, Celine, spoke to you, and Br..., D..., and even Fr. B... and D.... (these were general encouragements not necessarily related to the Rosebuds) Your friendship and its deepening surely could not have escaped even your notice.
Little one, do as your confessor and spiritual director bid. I will give your confessor a sign as he so desires proof but you must co-operate with Me to make this possible Do not hold back Lent is nearly upon you and soon you will receive other blessings, but you MUST remain humble and contrite for it is by no merit of yours that this will happen. My dear Cactus, promise Me in your heart that you will not turn away from Me even when the Cross is larger than you think you can bear.
Little One, I am always with you. You know that My Presence is so clear to you even in these days of such aridity, Remember that you have been taught Patience. All is in MY Time not yours. You have had to stand back from so much in the last weeks and months. But I wanted you to be patient and there are many things that I wish you to do. I wished you to help your son on his journey. All will be well but trust in My Providence for him. I am leading him to a place where he will find Me in such a way that he will never turn back. Pray much for him for he has a generous heart that bruises more easily than he admits, but he has a brave spirit. Do not worry about his relationship for all will become clear to him.
PATIENCE, Halina - Do not run before you can walk. True patience requires a sure belief in the Providence of God. Does it matter when I speak to you? No it does not, for each second is a gift and you have no right to expect it. Remember that patience does not require waiting but being - simply being at Our disposal. Sometimes this requires suffering as your human nature wishes to remove the agony of travail or sorrow or mourning. Other times it requires endurance with no consolation. Other times it requires you to temper enthusiasm, or submitting yourself to the unknown or even containing joy - all these things Halina, require you to submit and be before Us as nothing, empty. Remember that you are dust. No more or no less. Dust that can be blown about here and there and sent anywhere. A truly patient spirit will smile at all that befalls them and regardless of order or time. Please learn to be more patient.
Now stop but please take note of the signs I am giving you. Pray much for your pastor whose grief is deep and what he has lost and who....... ( Jesus makes a personal comment )
Do you like your new picture? Your Angel has shown you itself as you requested. I will tell you more. Stop now or you will be sick (writing in the car is not easy for me.).
I love you little lamb.
The story of acquiring the picture is really interesting. It was found in a second hand shop near us. It is over 130 years old. A friend had sent me a book from the USA and when I saw the picture in the shop not only was it identical to the picture in the book which is an unusual rendition but also like the angel Jesus spoke of.
Jesus continued to remind me of the virtue of patience in the following weeks before the next Rosebud. There are many references also to the other Rosebuds as for example in the last Rosebud there are references to endurance. Jesus was building or rather linking them together so as to make plain how they all fit together and especially so that they could be lived.
For example in the locutions before the next Rosebud I was "shown" this in a book about Paul of Graymoor ( Founder of the Franciscan Friars of the Atonement) the following reference to Patience.
" Yet faith must "Tarry the Lord's leisure," for with God 'a thousand years are but one day'. patience must be allowed plenty of time in which to do her work perfectly. She cannot and will not be hurried, the fabric is exceedingly delicate, the pattern most elaborate, The Robe of Unity she is weaving for her Son of God will be of matchless beauty, but it is the work of many generations and Hope with smiling countenance kneels and prays, being quite happy and content to wait." (Angell and La Fontaine p.70.) Although this refers to unity it stand in its own right.